Parents need to know that some of the antics Watch video Keeping Up with the Kardashians Momager Dearest On E!. Free Download Video Keeping Up with the Kardashians 27th May 2012 Episode On E! Tv Online Tv Live Streaming Video .Online Watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians Full Episode Watch Stream HD Video on Internet TV . in this reality show make The Osbournes look like The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. The Kardashian brood includes a 20-something with aspirations to pose in Playboy and a tween who instinctively knows how to work a stripper pole. Alcohol is a staple of many family gatherings, and while only those of age are shown imbibing (the tweens just mix the drinks...), impressionable young eyes aren't exactly shielded from the hard-partying lifestyle. Plenty of language, too, though the strongest words (including "f--k") are bleeped. During Khloe's acupuncture session (she's SO stressed, people!), Kim pricks her finger and says: "I just put it in me so hard." PLUS 3 for at least attempting a Ray J impression.
After Kris walks into his house, Scott says all he wants is a little privacy. MINUS 17 for saying this to a TV camera.
"I model because I'm more like a personality," says Kim while taking Kendall to NYC. MINUS 8 for her forgetting to add "a personality... that's less interesting than pocket lint."
Kourtney says a chair looks like a vagina. She likely knows from watching her sister's sex tape. MINUS 2. That's gross.
Kourtney also lies to her mother about why she needs the spare key to her house, and then lies to Scott about how she finagled the item from her mom. PLUS 6 for a job well done. No way either of them finds out about these fibs.
Lamar Odom helps Khloe flip the couple's mattress. PLUS 6 for showing more effort here than he did during the entire Lakers/Mavs playoffs series in 2011.
Oooh, tough one. Kris already found out about key-based lie Kourtney told her. That misdirection may have actually been shorter than Kim's marriage to Kris Humphries will be. MINUS 4.
Lu Sierra shows up. She's a Runway Coach. PLUS 5 for shocking me. Who knew someone had a more pointless job than Kim?
After Kendall doesn't take the coaching seriously, Kim says there are "honestly no words for how mad I am at Kendall right now." MINUS 10 to the writers. Their only job is to come up with words for these mannequins!
E! Entertainment appears to have adopted a full-employment act for women featured in notorious sex tapes, segueing from Paris Hilton's "The Simple Life" to Kim Kardashian, who the network charitably bills as a "tabloid princess." In keeping with the title, though, "Keeping Up With the Kardashians" actually widens its lens to encompass the whole irritating brood -- including Kim's sisters Khloe and Kourtney, mom-manager Kris and stepdad Bruce Jenner, who now has the distinction of having two sets of useless rich kids featured in pointless reality shows (his own alliterative duo, Brandon and Brody, appeared on FOX's "Princes of Malibu").
Once you get past Kim's prominently displayed assets, there's not much of a show here, and no discernible premise. As best I can tell, the tension -- at least in the second episode -- is supposed to stem from the fact that, as presented, Kris (who E!'s press release rather ickily dubs a "momager") is fairly inept at handling her daughter's non-career.
Indeed, were it not for E! (which previously featured Kourtney in "Filthy Rich Cattle Drive") and the tabloids, the Kardashian gals would be reduced to a footnote as the daughters of the late Robert Kardashian, a lawyer who gained attention during O.J. Simpson's murder trial.
Perhaps inevitably, the show exhausts most of its cache during the premiere, when Kim frets about appearing on Tyra Banks' daytime show and how they'll couch the conversation regarding her infamous (and widely available online!) videotaped frolic with rapper Ray J.
Elsewhere, one of her sisters goes on a date, Kris contemplates what's best for her talentless tarts, and Bruce sits around lobbing advice from the sidelines like a latter-day Mike Brady, albeit if "The Brady Bunch" was somehow blended with "Nip/Tuck."
The one amusing aspect of "Keeping Up" is the direct-to-camera interviews. All the Kardashians (and Jenners) seem to recognize that this is their shot at being more than pinup fodder and thus work extra hard to be engaging, but they often sound conspicuously as if they're reading off cards. Badly.Kris Jenner often pees herself. MINUS 7 because I don't care and because that's gross.
There's apparently a rule of no phones at the dinner table in this household. Multiple TV cameras, though? No problem! PLUS 9.
Kris is upset because her kids keep giving her a hard time over her bladder in front of strangers. Unless me and her are tighter than I realized, MINUS 19 for her complaining about this to a TV camera.
Bruce hopes to "inspire" others at a local heli-park. MINUS 12. Bruce Jennifer is an Olympian decathlete, folks.
These girls have to understand the value of money and hard work, Bruce says about his daughters. It's true. PLUS 3 because you can't just lie down, turn on a camera and invite Ray J into your room to get somewhere in life.
Kim uses the word "romantical." MINUS 47.
MINUS 112 because Kourtney just brought up her mom's "leaky vagina."
We just watched Kris Jenner get a gynecological exam. MINUS 879.
Kourtney and Kris are now doing simultaneous kegel exercises. MINUS 1,179. This is the worst half hour of my life.
PLUS 11 for Kylie and Kendall going to a downtown mission and meeting the first black people they've ever seen who aren't dating one of their siblings.